Mothers Day is upon us and it brings with it many memories.
When I was little and we went to church in the city, I recall wearing a pink carnation and my Mother wearing a white one. When I questioned this, my Mother explained that the pink represented a living mother, and the white a deceased one.
I wonder if anyone still does that?
Of course that was back in the day when women always wore a head covering to church, a hat or scarf, and always a dress or skirt because pants were only for casual affairs, and jeans were for farmers and hillbillies.
It has been 40 years since my first Mother's Day and I still cherish and love the series of homemade cards and gifts I received from my sons over the years.
They are packed away somewhere, but from time to time I come across them and they bring a tear to my eye. How much I wish I could go back in time and pick them up and hold them once again, hear the word "Mommy" again and really appreciate it instead of thinking Oh No!! What happened now? Can't you see that I am busy?
But life was easy when all anyone usually needed was a drink of water, a hug or a band aid. How could I not see that and enjoy the moment.
When I was sitting bedside with my own Mother as she was dying and unresponsive, all I wanted to do was say "Mommy, don't leave, please Mommy come back, I'm scared" like a little child again. But all I could do was hold her hand as she was passing and sit helplessly by her side.
I could never bring myself to call Jim's Mother "Mom" even though she wanted me to.
I know that he and she had a special relationship which surpassed me, but I appreciated her as a friend and respected her as a Mother.
I am also a Grandmother and very proud of my Grandson and his parents.
I wish we lived closer, but that is how the world is today. I receive his school reports everyday, and we video chat occasionally but I would love to have a close relationship with him like my sons had with their Mom Mom, Maybe in time that will be possible.
So to my sons, I love you dearly and miss you much. I thank you for making me a Mom and giving me a direction in life. You truly are the stars in my sky.
To my Mom,and Betty, RIP, You are in my thoughts today and I miss you.
