I wonder why I still get the Back to School Blues?
It's the end of August and the shadows are growing longer as the Sun shifts slowly away from me.
The temperature has suddenly dropped into the 70's, and the Sunday paper has nothing but "Back to school" ads.
As a kid I absolutely hated this time of year, even though it meant seeing friends again and meeting new people. I was the end of summer, of running barefoot and playing hide and seek until the street lights came on, sleeping in and reading only for pleasure, playing Monopoly and Scrabble on a big screened in porch.
As a teenager It was even more stressful, all of the Jr. and Sr. High school angst with dating, and wearing the right clothes, having the perfect body, mixing with the IN crowd, Not to mention the challenge of the Academics and trying to concentrate with all of these other distractions.
As a young Mother, it was a blessing. After a long summer, it was a relief to have structure again, especially when I was working full time.
Then came the Boarding school years and College and after the initial excitement wore off, and as my boys grew into men,the feeling of sadness started creeping back in little by little, year after year.
It was a sense of loss, a harbinger of days to come with separation being the status quo.
Now everyone is grown and married, and too far away to drop by for dinner.
I heard the little yellow school bus drove by this morning and before I even opened my eyes, I knew it was once again that dreaded time of year.

If only you got to know me, you'd be sorry for all the missed opportunities we had to share our hopes and fears .
If only you tried to know me, you would see how funny I can be, witty and compassionate, and what a strong shoulder I have to cry on.
If you even made an effort to know me you would see what a loyal friend I am and a worthy companion to spend time with.
If only you knew me you would know that my heart is as wide as the sea, and as open, but fragile and easily broken,
If you really knew me you would be aware of the hardships I have survived, the courage I have had to muster and the accomplishments I have acheived.
If only....... you wanted to......